I’m not over

I just finished my last shift at the bakery, and what a bittersweet relief it is. It will be great to be away from the sugar and the insanity, but I’ve met some amazing friends through there. However, it was well past time to let it go, and now it’s time to go do other things and support better causes. Yes I will miss the cake, even though it’s not good for me. Funny; that’s exactly how I feel about that last dude.

Phew; what a week. I severed a lot of ties and I think it was for the best. I’m going through a huge transformation and nothing will get truly better unless I change a lot of things- including eliminating more negative behavior patterns and toxic relationships. It sure ain’t easy though.

I keep waiting with terror for the wave of depression to hit, and I’m always afraid of how disabling it is. I’ve gotten lots of little waves, and my circumstances aren’t that great, but it’s an unbelievable relief to see that I’m not actually going under, nor have the crippling panic attacks flared up. Words can’t express how wonderful that is. From the outside I may look a mess, but on the inside I’m extremely grateful and I feel pretty damn blessed. All things considered.

Love to all

SOTD

Dreaming- OMD
I’m Not Over- Carolina Liar

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