How powerful does a human experience have to be before it leaves a mark on your soul? I only ask because there’s some shit I don’t want to repeat in any other lifetime.
I couldn’t sleep last night – all strung out, nerves screaming in a stupid panic attack. Today was an important day at work, and I knew I needed rest but I couldn’t shut my brain off. It was torture, and it made me wish for a lover to help me work off the anxiety in happier ways.
Insomnia is the worst, and you’d think I’d be used to it after so many years of sleep problems. Nope. It made my suspension class that much harder – drugged with exhaustion, dripping sweat. My brain drove me to do that too, and I feel tons better.
When in doubt with mental illness – work it out physically until your brain chemicals calm down. I completely understand Forrest Gump going for a run when emotions overwhelmed him – exercise is one of the most wonderful gifts/treatments. I should have done more of it last night, but I was too much mental pain to think of it. And for what? Nothing worth freaking out over. Dear sweet melatonin, help me ignore that shit and get some sleep tonight.
Love and restful sleep to all
One Good Lover – Siren
Big Decisions – My Morning Jacket
Try A Little Tenderness – The Commitments
Sleep – Allen Stone
Simple Song – The Shins