Apologies to my readers for the swamp of depression instead of the auto porn or travel writing that I prefer to post. Shit gets messy sometimes. I write about my battles with PTSD, depression, and anxiety because it helps me process things, and the act of formulating it into words is vastly therapeutic. I also dream of moments when someone who doesn’t understand these things, reads a post here and there and suddenly has an epiphany and a bit of sympathy for those who walk with these issues. We all got issues – mine aren’t unusual at all, but they are stigmatized still and intensely isolating.
This never ending panic attack feels like maybe it’s also allergies and some sort of vitamin deficiency. I can’t tell, nor do I want to be one of those annoying types who spends all their time obsessing on diets, vitamins, whatever. However, I should stop taking the pollen count as a personal challenge. I biked a huge 10 mile loop yesterday, and normally exercise helps, but breathing was rough even with my inhaler. So hard to tell sometimes if it’s a panic attack or a breathing issue – which comes first?